Come away with me...

Take me away...

That line has been haunting me the whole day.
Do you know the amazing number of songs that use that line?

"If you want to, I can save you. I can take you away from here..." Michelle Branch
"Take me away, a secret place..." Natasha Bedingfield
"I can't handle this confusion, I'm unable come and take me away..." Avril Lavigne
"带我走，到遥远的以后..." 杨丞琳

Here's my personal favourite though.
"Come away, my lover..." Song of Songs 8:14

"And I want to walk with you
On a cloudy day
In fields where the yellow grass grows knee-high
So won't you try to come?
And I want to wake up with the rain
Falling on a tin roof
While I'm safe there in your arms
So all I ask is for you
To come away with me in the night
Come away with me"
- Norah Jones

"You belong among the wildflowers
You belong in a boat out at sea
You belong with your love on your arm
You belong somewhere you feel free"
- Tom Petty

Do you hear God calling?
I do.

All You Wanted

by Michelle Branch

I wanted to be like you
I wanted everything
So I tried to be like you
And I got swept away
I didn't know that it was so cold

And you needed someone to show you the way
So I took your hand and
We figured out that
When the tide comes I'd take you away

If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted was somebody who cares

I'm sinking slowly
So hurry hold me
Your hand is all I have to keep me hanging on
Please can you tell me
So I can finally see
Where you go when you're gone

If you want to
I can save you
I can take you away from here
So lonely inside
So busy out there
And all you wanted was somebody who cares

All you wanted was somebody who cares
If you need me you know I'll be there
Oh, yeah

Describes how I'm feeling perfectly.

DOES ANYONE CARE?!?!?

My Happy Endings

Wow I'm hitting an all time record of posts in a month.
let's make it 21 for good measure :)
I'm hitting 200 posts soon!

I wonder if anyone reads my blog in the first place.
__________________________

I've a million thoughts swirling through my head.
Not uncommon for Ave. Happens often.
Sometimes I wished I could space out like Shwing.
Doesn't work.
My mind's on auto-work mode the first moment I gain consciousness from sleep in the morning.
It's terrible at times, honestly.
I'm gonna need some aspirin to thin out my blood (like this uncle at the pharmacy counter next to me today) with all the activity going on up here.
Well.
I should be thankful that there's actually activity going on up here, shouldn't I?

Thank You, God, that I am not brain-dead.
__________________________

Trying to find peace amidst all this confusion.
You know, there really is alot going on.
Too much, in fact.
I feel like taking a trip to Honolulu and staying there for a good 6 months before coming back. Without a single care in the world.
I could use a Sabbatical.

It's a wonder I haven't broken down yet,
Any of you out there listening?
I need a break!
I need someone who ain't coming to me for something!
I'm going to burn out and die soon.

Ok I'm going to sleep and it'll be better in the morning.
I hope it will be.
If this is a movie the happily-ever-after needs to happen about...now.

If I could run away...

I want a good book (like Disappointment With God or Rumours of Another World, which I am reading) and unlimited supply of dark cherry mocha frappé.
And a comfortable hammock between 2 palm trees.
Ok scratch the hammock. Don't know of one that's comfortable to sit and read in.
I'll need a deck chair and cushions.

Huggable cushions. (ah perfect!)

I'll need a deserted island to whisk myself away to.
It should be situated where the skies are cornflower blue and where clouds cover the sun so that it's not too hot and with just the slightest hint of breeze.
An occasional storm would be good, so that I can hide in my little wooden hut, snug under my comforter and feel safe.
And shipwrecks will wash up ashore to bring me supplies of dark cherry mocha frappé (and whatever other stuff I need to stay alive).

At night, there'll be stars.

I think I just described my version of heaven.

Ok I think I need to stop here and go sleep.

Life goes on

Took this pict off the net for street-e with Yinkoh.

Saved it as "waiting".

Such apt description of the current status of my life.

What am I waiting for?

That's the best part.

I don't even know.

All I know, is that I'm waiting for a sign from above.

Offering on the altar

"So here's what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering.

Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him.

Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking.
Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it.

Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you."

Romans 12:1-2 (The Message)

I love love LOVE The Message's translation.
It makes complicated things so simple and easy to understand.

Philip Yancey writes about the Benedictines.
Boy, that's a group of people I wanna get to know.

"We humans struggle to find a balance between expressing our desires without inhibition and squelching them altogether...I came back to Christianity because it made the most sense of the world around me, in part by achieving the necessary balance. It exalts every person as a creature made in the image of God and yet warns that the image has been marred, something I found true of everyone I met. It honors sex, money, and power as good things, God's own gifts, while also recognizing them as powerful force that msut be handled with care, like radioactive material. In short, it applies a dose of realism to the chaos of human longings."
Philip Yancey, Rumours of Another World

Expressing our desires without inhibition; squelching them altogether.
A does of realism to the choas of human longings.
Love the way he phrases it.

Word

I finally found out why I felt so restless and anxious.
Went swimming but all I could do was agonize over the fact that something was severely wrong with my life.
Got up and sat on one of the lounge chairs and finally it came.
All my prayers weren't working cause prayer wasn't the issue.
The issue was that I had not been reading my bible properly.
Like, sit-down-and-read-and-meditate-and-journalling-reflections kind of a read, not the read-it-while-I'm-having-breakfast-and-highlighting-verses-that-stand-out-to-me kind of a read.

I thought I had a devotional life.
I was kidding me.
The red warning light had been going on for awhile.
I just hadn't noticed, or tried not to notice.

So now I'm starting all over, all the way from Genesis, unlearning and relearning things as I go along. Thanks to my beloved CG that bought me a Quest bible for my birthday, I have something to guide me with. It's really cool, you know, the Quest bible! It comes with maps and a timeline and reading plans and footnotes of questions and answers and many many other things I haven't explored yet.
So cool :)

A very humbling experience.
We can be leading and ministering all out of our own capacities and not even realise it.
Owch.

Here's a toast to putting my life back into semblance of what it should be :)

"You Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path."
Psalm 119:105

Songs of the moment

Songs with surprisingly good lyrics :)

"Girl I can’t help but wait
Til’ you get that with him, it don’t change
Can’t help but wait
Til’ you see that wit me it ain’t the same
Can’t help but wait
Til’ you, see you, for what you really are
Baby girl you are a star"
- Can't Help but Wait


"This can only be as good as we both make it
Guess sometimes its gonna hurt
We can be as happy as we want to be girl
But we gotta make it work
We gotta make it work
Sometimes I love you
More than you'll ever know
Other times you get on my nerves
That's just reality
No, it can't always be
Kisses, hugs, and beautiful words
You was looking for your prince
What you found
Is a pauper with potential
And no, I'm nowhere near perfect
But i'm around
Girl, time and patience is essential"
- Make It Work

Verse of the moment

"My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him."
Psalm 62:5

A day in my only life

Rach said she thinks she's a Jesusfreak now!
I am so happy!!!

I'm signed up for a job interview and a blood donation drive this Sunday.
But before that, there's discussion tomorrow during CG, then there's bible study on Sunday morning. I so need to sleep.

My new top is work-in-progress!
I really could get the hang of this clothes-making thing :)

Now playing: Fire Fall Down

Ok I'm so totally random these days.
What am I trying to do anyway? Capture life as it flashes by? Will these details matter anyway in another decade?

Another random thought: I'm waiting for them to clear the pool so that I can swim again.

K-box today was awesome! But it rained so heavily I didn't get to eat my snow ice =/ we will make a trip to Summer Frost one of these days!
Had Mac's for dinner.
Eew eew eew eew eew.
Seriously, they've got us brainwashed. The evil golden arch is carved onto our minds everytime we think food.
So grossed out I couldn't finish my fries and milo. Went to buy fresh fruits to detox.
Oh did you know, the fresh fruits stall sells them at only 50cents per piece at the paya lebar hawker centre? Super worth it! I bought watermelon and papaya :)
Oh and, Snip Avenue is at block 192 of Toa Payoh. Ground floor. Facing carpark. Near donut shop. It's a hair salon that gives haircuts at $4.80, which are of better quality than the $10 haircuts. Add $4 and you get a wash as well!
Finally! A decent salon to save my hair at a price my mum is willing to pay.

Ok so that's life for you.
Wonder what's going to happen in the next 9 years.
Oh God I don't wanna be 30 yet!
Know what, I'm gonna take my twenties slow.
Do the things that I really like and which really matter.

We only live once.

Random happenings.

I am worth a guy who treasures me.
_____________________________
This is not in chronological order.

Taught Sebastz how to breathe under water.
Wrote 100 Truths on Facebook.
Discovered the difference between my homepage and profile page on Facebook.
Had breakfast with 2 of the nicest people I know.
Gave Han Yong and Shwing a tour of my school.
Redid my organizer.
Emailed Edwin.
Emailed Yi Jun.
Planned wardrobe for Hokkaido trip.
Played puzzle bobble at the arcade.
Started working on testimony publication for TM412, soon to be Frontline Youth.
Got a haircut.
Watched Bedtime Stories with Sam, Steph, Joyce and Daniel!
Had Frolick!
Tomorrow: k-box!
____________________________
I'm coming alive cause God's in my life.

Answered Prayer

It's easy to forget, in the face of pain, that it is about surrender.
Pure and simple surrender to God.
Pain is always so real that I sometimes forget.
It's a simple answer I keep coming back to.
Even if I love, I must surrender to the greatest Lover of all.
__________________________________

The miracle?
That God spoke through unlikely people, one of them a non-Christian at that!
So I am going to Hokkaido and nothing's changing that.
And I think I see fashion design in the near future, followed by Africa :)
__________________________________

Thank God for His generous grace in answering even when I've not exactly been praying along the right track.

Thank You, God, for reminding me how good You are.
And that You are real.
Above all else, that You are real.

I say Frappé!

Starbuck Hall of Faves
1. Toffee Nut Latte
2. Dark Cherry Mocha

Waiting to add to list...

R.I.A.

Oh where oh where has my roomie-dear gone?
Oh where oh where can she be?

You think we'll be friends for the next 50 years?
You, me and Shwing?
Till our hair is white and our teeth have fallen out and we can't walk and our voices are hoarse but we still wanna sing at k-box.
I can't believe we didn't get any time together before you left!
But it's ok you'll be back soon.
Ok so 6 months ain't that soon, but well, at least half that time's about gone by already.

When you get back, we are going to
1. Eat ice cream at B&Js
2. k-box
3. Sun tan! I bought new swimsuits :)
4. stayover
5. watch a chick flick
6. shop for Christmas
7. eat at this nice indo-food place at lucky plaza that is named after you

I'm not kidding it's called Ria. Yan Hui brought me and Yong Xin there it's delish!

Tell me who wants to look back...

...and wonder where all those years have gone?
_________________________________

You think it'll change if I really left on a jet plane?
I'm not sure.

I want my life to be about more than this.
I feel so pathetic.
How can my life be all about this?
There's a destiny to fulfil...


But what?


Didn't realise the danger I was in.
Nearly bulldozed those fences down.


Haphazard.
Bits and pieces.
I don't think I'm going to make sense until I've figured this thing out.

I Hope You Dance is playing.
Wish this song, this dance will just keep going on.

Thanks for standing up for me when you had no reason, Ian.
I appreciate it.

You are there and I am here.
The idea is still unfamiliar to me.

It doesn't get better.

Seems as though I was deceiving myself all along.
I never knew there was such a great divide.
Just when I'd convinced Shwing otherwise, I've started doubting myself.

God, what are You trying to prove?

You're my bleeding love.

Mozambique is in Africa

I'm remembering Ms Thory Chau from high school days, how God called her to Africa and she just couldn't ignore the signs anymore.

God, are you gonna give me a sign anytime soon?

I never knew so much could be accomplished within a span of 14hrs. Like yesterday.
Thank God for every day that I am alive and breathing.
I like the state of my room now - clean. Even the usual unreached nooks and crannies. There are photos on the floor, but it's ok, cause they're in the process of being sorted out.

Like my life.
Work in progress.

Heidi and Rolland Baker's description of Mozambique, Africa, is recalling memories of an article I read back in sec 2 about poverty. You think you know poverty. Then you read an article like it and you think, no, I do NOT know poverty.
And so you think you know tragedy.
Then you read a book like Always Enough and you realise, no, I do NOT know tragedy.

There are two ways you could respond.
Walk away unchanged.
Or allow God to do something inside your heart, something like surgery that gives you a heart of flesh.
The next step is to take action.
That's usually the hardest thing that often looks vague and flooded with uncertainty.
What?
Give up my life here to go there?

Maybe.
Maybe I will.

To the ends of the earth, remember?

To the Ends of the Earth

An old song I've forgotten.
I want my life to count.

Love unfailing
Overtaking my heart
You take me in
Finding peace again
Fear is lost in all You are

And I would give the world to tell Your story
Cause I know that You've called me
I know that You've called me
I've lost myself for good within Your promise
I won't hide it
I won't hide it

Jesus I believe in You
And I would go
To the ends of the earth
To the ends of the eart
For You alone are the Son of God
And all the world will see
That You are God
That You are God

I Hope You Dance

I hope you never ever lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger

I will remember to keep my hunger for things that are not of this world.

May you enver take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty-handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean

I want to get out there, where the mountains and oceans are.

Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens

I believe the door behind me has closed.
But I also see a door opening ahead of me.

Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance

If there's one thing I will never let go of, it's my faith.

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance

And I know that I shall always dance.

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance

It's the very path I am walking right now,
The road less travelled.

Living might mean taking chances, but they're worth taking
Loving might be a mistake but it's worth making

That is one mistake I am willing to make.

Don't let some hell-bent heart leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out, reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance

I pause in my tracks and breathe in the beauty of the heavens above.

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance

I am dancing to a different tune.
It comes from above.