Patience

Patience is easy in theory but darn, darn, darnit hard in practice!
Hello Joshua this is for you too :)

Time's been crawling the past few days.
It always happens when you're waiting on something.
I have no easy words of comfort; there is nothing I can say to make the process easier or even appear to be less of a faith-tester than it really is. But that's probably the whole point.
A faith-testing period.

My bible reading's of Job at the moment, which kinda helps in the screaming and being totally honest in my prayers bit.

I journal, I pray, I cry, I sigh, I blog, I read "Boy Meets Girl" and my bible in hope that something will make things better or at least get me through.

I walked off the career cliff awhile ago when I auditioned for LASALLE. Right now, as the frail, brittle walls of pretension crumble and the truth comes to light, I find myself walking off a second cliff that proves even harder than the first.
This time round, there's even less proof that I won't plunge straight to the bottom. I am so scared of waking up and realising there's nothing to break my fall.

Know what it feels like to be suspended with everything that matters dangling precariously in mid-air?
No, you don't.
Not until you've been here.

This is what it means to be held.
I have nothing else than all You offer me.